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Father Bob’s First Day on the Job
Deacon… I mean FATHER Bob walked into the sacristy. It was two minutes before the Saturday evening Mass began, the first he would celebrate at his new parish. “Father,” asked one of the servers, “what color are we supposed to vest the chalice in?” Father Bob looked stunned. Normally he would have asked his pastor,…
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Father Bob’s First Day on the Job
Deacon… I mean FATHER Bob walked into the sacristy. It was two minutes before the Saturday evening Mass began, the first he would celebrate…
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“Traditionalists are Having too much fun,” says Vatican Official
VATICAN—Following the move of the Summorum Pontificum Pilgrimage Mass from St. Peter’s Basilica to St. Mary Major, one Vatican official is telling The Roman…
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Op-ed: What Have I Done?
Op-ed—As we are currently in the season of creation, I took the liberty of finding the Latin propers for the votive Mass promulgated last…
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“THE SYNOD IS NOT A MONEY LAUNDERING SCHEME,” Sr. Nathalie claims
VATICAN—Undersecretary for the Synod of Bishops, Sr. Nathalie Becquart, XMJC, took to social media on Monday to dismiss claims that Synodality is just one…
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USCCB Declares this Sunday “not a holy day” following Assumption Feast
The USCCB, in an unprecedented move, has declared this Sunday will not be a holy day of obligation.
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Mobs of Prelates Storm Catholic News Sites to talk about the TLM
INTERNATIONAL—Catholic News sites are locking their doors and arming their security systems in an effort to dodge mobs of Catholic prelates who are demanding…
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Pope Leo Discovers that Pope Leo will not Overturn Traditionis Custodes
VATICAN—Pope Leo was reportedly shocked Monday morning to learn that he would not be overturning “Traditionis Custodes,” Pope Francis’ motu proprio that placed restrictions…
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Cardinal Bea says Pope John will not rescind new Breviary nor return to Clementine Psalter
VATICAN—The former rector of the Pontifical Biblical Institute (or “Biblicum”) and current President of the Secretariat for Promoting Christian Unity has stated that John…
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Burkas Mandated at Traditional Parish
KANSAS CITY, KANSAS—In an effort to increase modesty at Sunday Mass, Father Joshua Morgan of St. Timothy’s parish in Kansas City is mandating that…
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Rupnik Found Guilty Of Art Being Weird, Report Claims
VATICAN—A report circulated by InfoVaticana on Tuesday claims that priest and artist, Father Carlo Rupnik, will be completely cleared of any sexual crimes but…